The One True Thing

On a very special episode of Sex and the City, one of the characters said that men are just like women . . . except they touch their privates more often. Of all the information about men I’ve gotten from Cosmo, TV and my girlfriends, this has to be the only bit that has proven itself mostly true through the years. Men and women get a lot of information about the opposite sex thrown at them every day. Most of it is wrong. (I personally blame “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus” for most of the sexual confusion in this world.) There are times when I am less understood by my husband than by my dog . . . which is sad because my husband and I actually speak the same language.

If I had to choose one true thing that I wanted men to understand about women, it would be to listen more. My father always told me that people will tell you who they are; you just have to listen. Gentleman, women talk all the time. We constantly analyze the feelings and actions of ourselves and others. We hash it out over on the phone to our girlfriends and our mothers. We write about it in our blogs and journals. And we share it with you . . . sometimes while the championship game is going into overtime and making you want to murder us.

Restrain yourself from killing us or from tuning us out. Because somewhere in between all that musing over how we look in these jeans and the work gossip, is everything you need to know about us. It is these nuggets of truth that will help you navigate the world of women. That girl who won’t stop talking about their cousin’s wedding for months probably wants to get married ASAP and isn’t a good choice for a booty call. When your wife keeps talking about those Gucci shoes at the mall that means she wants them. If every time you do your favorite sexual move your girlfriend goes all quiet then it’s not working. Forget the men’s magazines or the advice from Eddie down at the bar. Everything you need to know about women comes right out of their mouths....written by P.S. Jones



As I lay next to a beautiful girl I just shared my most intimate bodily fluids with, our hearts pumping, our bodies sweating, our scent filling the room – I look into her eyes. And as I give her a look that could carve stone, I realize that she is meeting me with a very similar look. That leads me to wonder if she knows me as well as she thinks she does. More importantly – does she even care to know me? And if she does, what would she want to know?

Men are often portrayed as very simpleminded sex-driven creatures. While that creature may have emerged like the Toxic Avenger from some warped mind of a Hollywood screenwriter, that’s not at all what women should think about us, or our sexuality. In fact, what women should realize about us is much like how they view themselves. We too are incredibly complex sexual beings. We crave self-confidence, but lack self esteem. We are victims of a repressed culture that we created. We want a woman that we can take home to our parents and brag about to our friends who crave the dirtiest details.

Women are always portrayed as needing both love and a good balance of emotional and physical pleasure. However, most women don’t see men the same way and that’s a big mistake. If you think that the macho guy in the corner of the bar with tattoos up his neck driving the muscle car doesn’t need affection and a good balance of sex and sensitivity – he is fooling you and fooling himself at the same time.

So the question always comes back to what would women want to know about men? I think the answer is pretty simple. Men really aren’t as different as our stereotypes have led us to believe. Getting to know what you like yourself will help you to understand what men might like as well. Stop trying to figure out who’s from Venus and who’s from Mars. We’re all from this planet and we need to figure out how to make it work!....written by Andrew Jensen

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