The Legend of Goldie-cocks

I once had sex with a man and didn’t know it. No, I wasn’t drugged and raped. I was in the middle of naked cuddling that turned to naked kissing, which led to naked grinding. After a few moments, he let out a moan and then apologized for cumming so fast. I was speechless. I had no idea he was even inside me! Later, as my friends grilled me on the status of our relationship, they asked me if we’d slept together. My answer was “He says we have, but I don’t know if I believe him.”

As a woman who’s received more than her share of small penises, I have to tell you that all those men’s magazines you’ve been reading are wrong. Me telling a man that penis size doesn’t matter is like telling a flat-chested woman that boobs don’t matter. Of course, boobs matter. The entire world is run on boobs! But let’s say that you met a woman who was super sexy, smart, funny, caring, a great cook and loved football . . . with no tits. Unless you’re a moron, you’d never let her go. But you’d probably spend the rest of your life staring at any chest you met. Women feel the same way about your penis.

Size DOES matter . . . just not as much as you think it does. We are definitely fascinated with humungous dicks in much the same way you’re fascinated by Pam Anderson. But do we really need all those inches? Probably not. But nobody wants to have to bring a magnifying glass to bed with them, either. Call me Goldie-cocks if you must, but I think I represent most women when I say that I want it to be “not too big, not too small, but just right.” A decent sized member teamed up with a fair knowledge of how to use it is perfect. In my experience, the person who cares most about your penis is you. You’re the one secretly checking out those enhancement ads that show up in your email and comparing yourself to the guys in the pornos. You want a healthy sex life? Stop letting your dick distract you and start paying attention to what I need. Unless yours really is the size of a cocktail weenie. In that case, I’ll go half with you on the penis pump....written by P.S. Jones



Does size matter? All of us guys who were not blessed with "stuff strutting size" hope that the answer to this question is NO... but I think not. Even as a young 18 year-old, I used to say, "It's not the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight in the dog!". Then one day, a woman looked at me and replied, "Well, you better have something to work with!" At that point all the fears, insecurities, apprehensions, and nightmares descended.

How big am I? Am I at least average? Unless you are hung like a porno star, I think every guy has these fears. I have had girlfriends who have told me they love my dick because it “fits right.", but I've always wondered if that is a nice way of telling me I am small. I feel the three most devastating words a woman can ever say to a guy is, “Is it in?" I have spent hundreds of dollars on pills to add length and girth to my endowment, but while my wallet shrinks, my penis has not grown a millimeter. I have heard the saying that "size does not matter", and the average guy is 5 1/2 to 6 1/2 inches when erect... They just don't get jobs in porno movies. All the logic and statistics in the world do not ease the insecurities when I have friends who are reputed to be enormously blessed, and I see women approach them simply because they want a test drive.

So does size matter??? OF COURSE IT DOES... especially if you are BIG! Fortunately, I’ve never had anyone complain, and God has blessed me with more hotter women than my charm, looks, and wit justify.

Here is my theory on penis size. Like every other sexual option, all women are different. There are a few who really want a big penis, some that enjoy a smaller penis, and others who don't have a strong preference either way. Some women simply like the experience and the intimacy, and the size of the dog is less important. The good thing about being insecure about my size is that it forces me to "try harder" to please. That means lots of foreplay, tons of oral, vibrating toys, and finally, when she calls for it... penetration... which usually delivers the desired climax and overwhelming waves of ecstasy... on a good day!

Yes, it would be nice to have an endowment bigger than a Harvard trust fund. Imagine the confidence that gives you if you are anatomically blessed. But if you are average or smaller - accept the fact and simply try harder... by the time you put it in, she will be able to go off with anything bigger than your pinkie finger. And let's face it... if you can deliver an earth moving climax... you won't have to answer to the "cruel reality" of the tape measure....written by Cliff Hodges

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Position Play

What’s the big deal about positions? I don’t get it. To me when someone says “lets try something new”, they are actually saying “I’d like to try someone new.” I don’t understand the need for the Karma Sutra; it’s about the partner not the position. Not to say there aren’t a lot of fun positions, only that it takes a special man to enjoy special positions with this girl. By “special”, I don’t mean a partner that is really attractive or good in bed. Special to me, is a partner who makes me feel comfortable, respected and safe while in bed with them.

Everyone has hang ups in the bedroom and I am no different. Who wants their boobs flopping all over the place? Who wants unwanted or unavailable curves emphasized during sex? Not me. For women, the way we feel about ourselves plays a significant role in our behavior in the bedroom and hence how crazy kinky we are going to get.

While missionary is a safe and loving position, a lot of people think it’s dull and unimaginative. I think most of us, unless we are very drunk, tend to still choose this position for our first sexual encounter with a new partner, and so it shouldn’t be discounted. Woman on top is what I consider to be a confident or spotlight position, which sucks for the self-conscious because it’s also one of the more pleasurable ones. In this position, a woman not only controls the rhythm but can also grind her pelvis into her partner’s groin, for additional pleasure. A lot of women avoid it like the plague though. I have one friend who has the rule that when she’s on top, her guy’s eyes are shut. Sounds like a whole lot of fun to me.

If there is talk of sexual positions, there needs to be reliable communication. Nothing is sexier to me than knowing I am on the same page as my partner. Tell me that my body is beautiful and that I would look amazing in a particular position, and I will bend myself into a pretzel for you. Flattery will help any woman find the confidence she may be lacking; it’s that simple. Communication also allows my partner and I to address power issues which can be fun. The issue of power is not relevant in all relationships, however there are men and women who find power play an incredible turn on and like to engage in sexually dominating or passive positions during sex. While I may be cool in one position with a steady partner, a new partner doesn’t have a chance of succeeding. While there’s nothing wrong with taking the initiative, I like men to do so in the bedroom. Please remember that it takes two to tango and we both need to know the steps. Oh, and don’t go over board! Men watch way too much porn; the proof is in the position. Why is it that men want to change positions numerous times? They obviously don't realize how hard it is for most women to reach an orgasm, especially when being thrown around like a rag doll. If you want to mix it up guys, throw some oral sex in for flavor. I believe they still perform it in porn.

There is no doubt that positions play a roll in determining the pleasure ratio both physically and physiologically. I’m up to having fun and trying new things. Just remember, I come equipped not only with an erogenous zone but a comfort zone as well....written by Brooke Mullins



To my (straight) male friends reading: Isn't it cool to be having sex missionary with a woman and be able to whisper into her ear, "Wrap your legs around me," while you stand up, grab her ass and leave her suspended in the air? I find it fun, and as a bonus, if there is a mirror in front of me I can get a great view from behind of my partner. I get a huge ego boost knowing that I can support her and for an extended period of time. She gets added clitoral stimulation from the up and down motion of me lifting her. But the best part of this is the power and virility I feel, as a man, flaunting my strength in such a way. The thought process is something like, "If I can keep this stuff up, she'll continue to stay in ecstasy." Whether this actually happens or not, is beyond me.

From my personal confession above, we can see a lot about the necessity of positions. I think that positions are a great way to ease boredom, find new tastes and discover what you like and don't like. We can find positions that complement our individual personalities and show off our desirable traits (like looking at the well corded back muscles of your partner while doing it doggy style--you can never get that from missionary).

It's a double edge sword with this kind of thing. You have to try out new stuff to keep it fresh--imagine if we can periodically change our job, cars or family. On the flip, if something isn't broke, don't fix it (which is something all guys tend to do in every area of life). Sometimes I try weird stuff simply because I can. Plus, I think if I change it up a bit in bed, I might actually impress a woman and she'll want to have more sex.

All in all, I enjoy trying a plethora of positions. Part of it is because I can, and that I hope to impress the women I'm with. There's the stimulation from each, but I think experimenting becomes more fun than the pleasure derived from the actual outcome. It’s not necessarily the amount of positions you try, but the quality of the person you're having sex with....written by Peter Baker

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You’ve Got a Pierced What?

Have you ever heard the one about the couple who were wheeled into emergency on a gurney? The doctor tried his hardest not to laugh when the couple, red faced, sheepish and huddled together under a blanket, explained that their genital piercings had somehow gotten tangled together during sex and that they were consequently stuck together. Sure, we’ve all heard that old wives tale taken from the modern lover's book of sex, warning of the consequences of tampering with the nether region. I wonder though, how long it took the doctor to get those two apart and if the sex was worth it?

The fetish of pierced genitals, while popular, is something I have never even remotely considered for myself. I don’t have any interest in decorating my girl bits like a Christmas tree, and if my guy dropped his pants and was pierced below, I would wonder what he needed to prove. Now don't get me wrong, there was a time when I did find the whole bad boy piercing thing a bit of a turn on. While I never had any interest in genital piercings, in college, I was totally ready to get my tongue done. As fate would have it though, my housemate whom I was to get the piercing with, had it done with a friend while I was away. Any resentment or envy I may have harbored didn't last long and neither did the piercing. Within a week, both she and the other girl had to have them removed after the pain and swelling became excruciating. I don’t regret missing out on that experience, although there is something sexy about having a little, silver stud in your mouth, that you can tempt the opposite sex with, just by flicking your tongue. Men tend to be fans of pierced tongues because the stud apparently feels great on their swollen penis, but is that enough of a reason to do it? I guess a lot of people think so, but when I think of my housemate slurping soup through a straw, I know it is definitely not for me.

The farthest I ever got with piercings was a second hole on my right ear, which I’m pretty sure, has closed due to lack of use. Lots of my friends went further, almost all donned a belly button ring at some point. None of them wear one currently though, which makes me wonder if people’s piercing preferences is at all related to their given age. How cool is it to see an old lady with a clit ring?

While anything can be sexy on the right partner, is there really a need to stud or jewel the body? It’s beautiful and sexy without the need for gimmicks or neon signs. Of course, if you’re into a little S&M then I can totally see how pulling on a pierced nipple can be fun, but there are always high heels and whips for those of us who feel that we already have a sufficient amount of holes in our bodies....Written by Brooke Mullins



Please excuse me in advance for possibly sounding more shallow than I am, at a sooner time than I'd like. I will never forget that part in Pulp Fiction where Vincent Vega mentions to a heroin using friend of his something about "the girl with all the shit on her face." As it turned out, said girl was actually his friend’s wife, to Vega's chagrin.

I am not sure at what point or how people with piercings get to where they are. Do they wake up and say, "I think today I will put many holes in my face and while I am at it, on my genitals, too." People say it's a form of expression, like tattooing. I do not disagree. However, too many visible piercings are a deal breaker for me, in the realm of sex and romance. I don't find metal and steel to be attractive in anyway. I will opt not to "holla" if a girl has a metal face. (There are exceptions which I can count them on one hand).

There is a practical element to piercing yourself, from what I hear. Apparently, men like the tongue ring due to some sort of stimulation the penis can receive during fellatio. I have never found this to be true. Word on the street also is that women with genital piercings can have better and/or more frequent orgasms during sex. I have never had the pleasure of seeing this happen. Actually, my mood would be killed if I were about to go down on a woman and saw some metal in my way. The same could be said of nipple piercings too. They can serve a practical purpose as well. Like the clitoris, nipples can become sensitive upon being pierced. So maybe the rationale behind piercing is the practicality of it all, though I doubt it. Although I have no metal in my skin, for a man, ear piercings are so common these days that most people don't think much about it. However, a scrotum piercing is a different story.

To ask why people get pierced will yield responses as diverse as the population of the world. I myself would rather not have pierced flesh on myself or a partner. But there is something attractive in the confidence of someone who can walk out in the world pierced before the masses, and maybe that's why many find piercings to be sexy. Choose what you will....Written by Peter Baker

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